Social Studies
Social Studies
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"Social Studies" is a four-minute, rapid-fire satire about power, politics, and popular culture, seen through the lens of characters who spring from the mind of actress, playwright and author Iris (e-reese) Bahr. Raised in both the Bronx and Tel Aviv, Iris has traversed the globe and has a unique take on just about everything. Her memoir, "Dork Whore: My Travels Through Asia as a Twenty-Year-Old Pseudo-Virgin" was published in March 2007 by Bloomsbury. Her solo show "Dai," a one-woman multi-character play about Israelis, has been performed Off-Broadway as well as at the United Nations and the Edinburgh Festival (August 2007) and was nominated for a Drama Desk Award for Outstanding Solo Performance. "Social Studies" characters include Svetlana, Russian prostitute to Hollywood stars and political heavyweights.
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I thought I would be able to avoid Mahmoud when he came to New York last week, but sadly I had already committed to session with him and I have strict no-cancellation policy for both me and my clients. In short, I had to go through four-hour nightmare of post-talk pep session with him over his performance at Columbia University. He's never happy with anything this guy. First thing he does when he sees me - He starts complaining that Columbia was not his first choice, that he had really wanted to speak at Harvard or Yale...
Power Outtage
My phone has been ringing off the hook with calls from Assad and Kim Jong Il, grilling me about Israeli air strike. "We know head air force commander is your client," they tell me..."
General Freebie
Hello, this is Svetlana Maksimovroskrakghaya with Social Studies for KCRW. I have always liked Toronto film festival because its good way to pick up new clients and catch up with old ones, but this year was a little more difficult, because the majority of my time there was spent watching The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. The film should have been called What Happens When You Put a Bunch of Already Somewhat Nervous Types of People That Are Afraid of Each Other in one Room Together for Extended Periods of Time...
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The last few weeks have been full of surprises for me, and I am sorry to say they have not been in the bedroom. After years of radio and email silence suddenly I am getting text message from Sammy Bin Laden, and it was upsetting to say the least...
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I thought I was going to be late today because I spent half the day at one of those fantastic Los Angeles stop sign intersections. I motion to one guy, "Go go!" and then he looks at me and he motions no you go, already wasting two minutes of my life. So I go, and then this Asian woman decides now is good time for her to go also, I was so angry I took the mango I just bought from Mexican on corner and threw it at her windshield. She thought her world was ending...
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I came back from Iraq last week to find my financial records in complete disarray, that's what happens when you have Conrad Black doing your accounting as favor, now I have $200,00 unaccounted for and only Tony Blair scheduled for this weekend...
Iraqi Nigiri
I have always considered myself a peace loving woman, even my S&M clients say I have soft touch with even the most pointy devices. So it goes without saying that I am against this war in Iraq but when Bushie asked me to go service the troops last week I hopped on plane without second thought...
Lewis 'Sicko' Libby
Let me tell you something, having to party with Scooter Libby for the last four days has not been picnic, but it did not compare to the hardship involved in watching Mikey Moore's new film, Sicko. I am telling you, playing naked foosball in Siberian Gulag is easier than watching this film. And trust me I have done both I know what I am talking about...
Hamas Express
It has not been a festive week me at St. Petersburg house of discreet pleasure. I had emergency visit to West Bank last week and my head is killing me...
A Mighty Ocean
I have to tell you, I was so happy to hear from Angie this week, we were very close for many years we even have same tattoo in the lumbar section near vertebrate 47, the point is I have missed her and it was so good to get phone call from her last week, she said to me, "Svetlana, we need a blonde so we are thinking of bringing small Russian boy into our soccer team family and we wanted to talk to you about your connections"...
Knocked Up on Darfur
Hello, This is Svetlana Maskimvoskaya with Social Studies on KCRW. It has been hectic few weeks at St. Petersburg house of Discreet Pleasure with many of my clients needing special attention after their political debates, so I was happy to take a movie break, so I called Rick Santorum, client, many years, who's always had fantastic taste in cinema, we used to go to Fassbinder festivals together, he told me Svetlana you have go see this comedy Knocked Up. This is apparently term for pregnancy. And then they wonder about domestic violence...
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Host
Iris Bahr is a writer and actor who channels different characters as she makes pointed observations about modern life, Hollywood, politics and popular trends. More info at www.irisbahr.com.
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