Veteran TV writer and producer Rob Long shares his behind-the-scenes look at Hollywood life on "Martini Shot." A contributing editor for the National Review and Newsweek International, he was a co-executive producer of "Cheers" while still in his 20s and is the co-creator of a string of (cancelled) sitcoms: "George & Leo," "Men, Women & Dogs," etc. Rob is also the author of "Conversations With My Agent," the cult classic about real life in Hollywood, as well as its recently published sequel, "Set Up, Joke, Set Up, Joke."
Photo credit: Marc Goldstein
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We take two million dollars and we give it to forty eight people we find on Hollywood Boulevard. Or, as some call it, we focus group a pilot.
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We repaint a set instead of doing what we need to do, which is rewrite the scene. But repainting is easier because somebody else has to do it.
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On today’s Martini Shot, I sell a series without a script starring an actor who doesn’t even know the project exists. In other words, it’s pilot season.
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Rob Long makes demographically undesirable references and attempt to appeal to the young people on the Facebook website.
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Rob complains about other writers who complain about other writers, and decries the pettiness of his colleagues in a really petty way.
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An actor throws a big party to watch his television debut. What he doesn't know is, he's been cut from the show. Humiliation, as always, makes the best comedy.
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I handle my powerful enemies in the best Hollywood way: I wait like a coward until they’re fired, and then I pounce.
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An actor fires his agent for telling the truth, and another fires his agent for lying. In other words, we do the impossible: we sympathize with agents.
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Rob Long wears a thing on his wrist that tells him how much exercise he's gotten and how long his career might last. It syncs to his phone.
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Everyone in Hollywood hires lawyers to protect against the disaster that happens when something is successful. It's perverse, which is why only the lawyers understand it. …
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Rob Long loves improvisational comedy -- especially when they write it down and rehearse it first.
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Fashion and style tips for the working writer. Tip One: remove the tag before the meeting.
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Rob Longs talks about a writer who discovered that being accurate and truthful is a fast trip to the remainder bin. The only way to get rich is to make it all up.
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Rob Long talks about the most famous maxim of show business – Nobody knows anything – and why it's true and why the opposite – Everybody knows everything – is also …
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Program Details
Host
Rob Long
Rob Long presents a laugh-out-loud, mostly true telling of life behind the scenes of the "real" Hollywood.
Schedule
Live
Tapes & Transcripts
Click the Full Details link to view the complete transcript. Tapes are not available.